Does Therapy Really Work for Empaths?

A few months ago I was out for a run and, as so often happens, I got a message from my spirit community about how to help empaths or highly sensitive people. The message was loud and clear that in most instances, traditional psychotherapy does not align with what empaths need to heal and change things in their life that is not working for them.

Now, this is not new information for me as I have observed this anecdotally for years. For decades, in fact I have tried to adjust counseling interventions such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to better fit the needs of this unique group. I have modified E.M.D.R. strategies to help when there is trauma in the background.

There is a current idea that ‘we are broken’ and therefore ‘we must be fixed’ that is truly problematic in my opinion, and I write about this at length in my book. Yes, there are short term interventions that can be helpful in short-term situations or when there is something going on that is a crisis, or acutely stressful. I am well-versed in and in fact used to teach these modalities. However, for so many of the people I regularly work with this is a band-aid approach at best. Why is this? Many people I see in the practice, and in Transforming Pain to Power, the healing program, have deep seated patterns of putting other people’s needs and feelings first that were part of their early conditioning and thus difficult to change. Reframing negative thoughts, as is offered in C.B.T. may help - but doesn’t address the root of the issue or offer significant ways to heal and shift these patterns. It doesn’t incorporate your unique spiritual gifts or abilities.

The best example I can offer here is about anxiety. For many of us we can experience anxiety, be it fleeting or enduring, when we are afraid of upsetting someone or making them angry. This is particularly true if you have had to read, interpret and respond to someone who is volatile, toxic or unpredictable - or if you were ever on the receiving end of the silent treatment. I know this because it comes up in session pretty much every day. There can be a fear response when reading other people’s emotions and reactions as well. This by definition is not anxiety - anxiety is when we cannot tolerate uncertainty, and clinical anxiety comes with an array of other physical symptoms and cognitive maladaptions. This is not what happens with empaths, or at least not most of the time. It is difficult to then offer the idea of reframing negative cognitions as being ‘untrue’ - because most of the time what you are feeling IS true but you need to learn strategies for how to work wisely and kindly with your intuitive messages. This is a process of self inquiry, mindfulness and discernment.

I created the healing program ‘Transforming Pain to Power’ to offer a path to shifting these early conditioned self-beliefs, bringing old attachment patterns into conscious awareness and integrating your unique ability to have a ‘deeper knowing’ into your everyday life. This is not a ‘you are broken and need to be fixed model’. So many people I see have been told their whole lives that something is wrong with them, that they have ‘mental issues’ and that they need to seek therapy. If you work with me, what I offer is the opportunity to realize your wholeness, create boundaries to protect your energy and seek people and situations that align with your values and what you hold true. This is the healing path that leads you to living life on your terms.